
| Location | Dumfries |
| Age | 1 month |
| Date of Birth | 9/2007 |
| Date of Death | 10/2007 |
| Visitors | 14,334 since 04/11/2007 |
| Creator |
this site is for a special little lady who sadly lost the fight, 30th 0ct at 6.15pm she was a brave
little angel who is greatly loved my many but none more so than by her mum amanda and brothers ali
and theo she had a very short time on this earth but has made a great impact on us all i\'ve
created this site for her mum and family to come on and tell her story when they are ready to do so
but wanted them to all to know i am thinking of them and little faith will eternally travel with
them all
Thanks Ronnie!!
Thank you all for visiting Faith\'s memorial page which Ronnie kindly set up for her to be
remembered.
Faith maybe had a short life but it was certainly eventful and had more ups and downs than a
rollercoaster!! Now ... when she was born on September 3rd she came 4 weeks early, I was due in for
to get induced on 17th which would have made her two weeks early.
My waters broke at 4:30am and I rushed to the hospital as i knew that she had to be born in Queen
Mothers Maternity Hospital in Glasgow because of her Cognital Diaphragmatic Hernia. However ...
Faith continuing to be the awkward lil madam she had been through the whole pregnancy decided that
she\'d be born in Dumfries and by C-section.
She arrived at 6:16am and was taken away straight away by the consultant. I expected this, her
being taken away, I did think i\'d get to at least see her before she went tho ... I
didn\'t even get a glimpse. (The birth was mad ... the male nurse and i sat and talked about
people with Autism and the different levels of the spectrum. When he said \"6:16\" I had
no idea what he was on about!!)
Hours passed ... Erica was the first person to come and visit me, I was desperate to see her, they
wouldn\'t let me move until i had a little bit of feeling back in my legs. I worked at it and
worked at it until i was able to wriggle in my bed ... apparently i was quick at coming round! (I
wonder why?!)
At 11:15am I had been allowed to go through to see Faith. She was so perfect, I just wanted to pick
her up and cuddle her. She had the cutest ever pink hat on. Tammy was first to go in with me, then
my mother came in, then Erica. After taking loads of pictures, asking loads of questions (that i
can\'t even remember what they were) we left her so that she could start her journey up the
road to Glasgow with the staff from the Queen Mum\'s.
I got taken onto the ward in Dumfries. All i could think about was getting to Faith, I cried and
cried when i couldn\'t get there. When it was lunch time i sat forwards to eat up (by god did
the section wound hurt) but i still managed to sit forwards. I finished eating and went to sit back
in the bed and the nurse came back to the room i moved my covers forwards to sit back more
comfortably and suddenly i rushed the bed with blood from my section wound.
The nurse thought that it was just some blood that had been sitting behind the wound that needed to
come forwards. It was left at that and I had several visitors in the afternoon. Laura Clash came
in, Aunt Jane, Aunt June and Rebecca. My shoulders started getting so painful, the nurses got me
heat packs that seemed to sort out the problem for the time being.
I got more and more mobile, I was adamant that i was getting to Glasgow, all i cared about was
getting to my baby before she had to go for her operation. Still armed with my cathater (what a
horrible thing that was!), I had a really bad dose of the runs due to some of the painkillers
they\'d fed me. The more i moved the more painful i had become in the shoulders and under the
ribs.
All i could think about was the chances of me getting to Faith slippin further and further away as i
pressed the buzzer for the nurses to come and help me when i couldn\'t move in my bed.
Emotional pain ... apparently that was all that i was suffering ... silly cow ... a mother knows the
difference between emotional pain and physical pain!!
Emotional pain ... by gawd was i fed up of that midwife by the time she finally got the doctor to
come and see me at the end of her shift!! He sent me for scans and x-rays to find out if there was
a problem (if!). However to cut a long story short Tuesday evening about 8pm i was taken into the
operating theatre and this put me back getting to Glasgow, on the Friday morning i was told that
i\'d be going on Monday after the weekend.
Friday mornin i received a phone call from Mr Carl Davis from Yorkhill hospital asking for
permission to carry out the operation on Faith to fix her diaphragmatic hernia. I was gutted ... I
couldn\'t get to Glasgow ... no one was going to be there for her and I couldn\'t get
there!
I forced myself to get out of my bed, into the shower, prove to the doctors that i was fit enough to
travel. I wanted there the next day ... Saturday morning i just wanted to be there with her.
Instead the Doctor was that impressed that I\'d got up and sorted out that he let me go up the
road on the friday afternoon.
I was packed and ready to go half an hour before the guy came to take me! I got up to the Queen
Mums and booked in ... the nurses were very adamant that i needed someone to go over with me to the
new ward that she was on. 2B in Yorkhill. I didn\'t care if i was on my own or with Jesus ...
I just wanted to be with the little soul.
I went up to the ward with one of the nurses from the Queen Mum\'s. When i got into the room
that Faith was in I couldn\'t help myself but break down. That little girl was laid out on her
bed looking as if she was taking fits (it was just the type of ventilator she was on tho!).
\"What the hell have i done to her\" I asked Carl Davis. \"Given her the chance to
live\" he replied.
He went on to explain about the ECMO machine and how Faith had to go onto it to give her lungs a
chance to develop. They wanted to put a fluid into her lungs to try and get a bit bigger as they
were very condensed by her stomach, liver and bowel in her chest cavity.
I went back over to the Queen Mum\'s and waited on them putting her onto ECMO and the doctors
coming over to talk to me about everything since i had such a lot to take in. Tammy, Erica and Aunt
June came up to make sure i was alright following a call from the hospital asking them to come and
stay the night.
Erica stayed the weekend with me and supported me with everything. I stayed in the queen mothers
for 5 days then finally got discharged. I went to stay in Ronald McDonalds, the parent accomodation
across the way.
Daily i\'d spend hours with Faith, her ups and downs with her health was just like that
rollercoaster i mentioned earlier. The fluids they were using to try and expand her lungs
wasn\'t working so they decided to try her off the ECMO machine and going onto Kidney Dialysis.
She spent three days off Kidney Dialysis and ended up back on the ECMO. Everytime they tried to
take fluid off her using it she let her blood pressure drop. I had to rush back from Dumfries to be
with her as she was unstable again. Faith had been put back onto ECMO and this time it was for her
heart and lungs instead of just lungs.
All the time she was on ECMO she maybe looked puffy but she always looked a picture of health.
It\'s so horrible not to see what\'s actually wrong and them looking a picture of health.
I got told she had less than a 50% chance to come off ECMO but she turned that around n was able to
come off ... fair enough she went back onto it but she still got off it!!
The 2nd time that she was back on it they were talkin about her future plans ... they wanted to move
her into another ward ... PICU where they could give her 24 hour kidney dialysis instead of 12 hour
kidney dialysis. This was scary but such a vital thing to happen.
She moved through there and within a few days they wanted to try taking her off her kidney dialysis
again, they tried twice on the Friday morning and she almost slipped away both times, however they
topped up her fluids and gave her a dose of steroids and she was perfect again. 3rd time lucky!!
Kidney dialysis was working fine ... she was running at negative levels for the first time in her
life (which amazed everyone as she always liked to be a little positive!). Then she caught an
infection ... blood cultures showed that she was sensitive to a couple of the medicines that
they\'d been giving her. They started giving her antibiotics and fight against the infection.
In the mean time she was struggling to maintain a temprature, her bowels hadn't moved in
several days and on Tuesday 30th October she took a cardiac arrest in the morning. The doctors
asked me to attend a meeting in the afternoon to discuss the plans for Faith and they asked me if
they could switch her machines off as it was getting harder and harder for her to fight and
they\'d no way of trying to get her to recover from everything that she had faced. It was the
hardest ever agreement that i\'ve ever had to make but it was definately the right decision to
make.
Tammy and my mother came up the road and was there with Rab and I when Faith passed over. My first
longed for cuddle was my last one, but at least she got to pass in my arms and feel my warmth and
love toward her. Tammy sang to her, I think that was to stop her crying but she did so well and it
stopped all of us from crying. Faith fought on for a very surprising length of time after all the
machines were switched off.
She did herself proud!
After she passed I got to bath her and get her dressed into her clothes, she looked so beautiful, so
peaceful, there was no cables or wires coming from her little body. She ended up with glitter on
her ... i\'ve no idea where it came from but i certainly feel it\'s just like angel dust.
My little angel was taken away at 6:15pm I left her at 9:45pm. I spent my time with her giving her
the cuddles she deserved so that she knew that she was loved.
I\'ve spent many hours with her since she passed and tomorrow is the last time that i\'ll
be able to see her, it\'s going to be a very emotional time. She will be dressed in the
gorgeous dress that Emma and Wing bought her, letters will go into her coffin from Ali and myself.
Her memory will last forever ... not just from her family but by everyone\'s hearts that she
touched ... she touched so many!!
Nakita (her neighbour in PICU who passed two days after Faith) and Faith will be watchin down over
us from the stars sendin us their love. Don\'t spend too much time playin with the stardust!!
Kyle Alexander Mullen, her neighbour and friend that lived with her in 2b then PICU also passed late
December. Another little angel to play in the stars.
Emily Ellie Mae Trickett, a true friend's princess that has joined Faith. Have fun playing in
the stars lil girl ... sprinkle lots of stardust near your Mum Dad and sister as often as you can!!
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Faith\'s funeral took place on Monday 12th November 2007 at 3pm.
The song list (for you that have requested it) was
Damien Rice - Cannonball
U2 - With or without you
Athlete - Wires
Evanessence - My Immortal
The donations that were received at the funeral were given to the ECMO team in Yorkhill hospital in
Glasgow. £140.51 was handed over last week. Thank you all for the donations, hopefully
it\'ll help other people be so fortunate even if it is only to have a little bit of extra time
with their little one!
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On 6th January I was back up at Yorkhill to receive the post mortem results for Faith. Mr Davies
was very surprised with her.
There was no visible signs of brain damage, her lung was really clear and if she had survived she
would have had been strong. Her intestines were working, she had a scar on her heart, they had no
idea when she got it. All of these problems could have been workable, however they didn\'t
help her in the long run. The major playing part of her having to go was that her kidneys were very
immature and she had a dependancy on steroids. We\'ve no idea why her kidneys were immature,
however she was the only child in the whole of the UK to have been born with this. They\'re
doing research into this condition.
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26th March 2008
Faith's story has been featured in the Scottish Sun ... hopefully it'll raise awareness
for the CDH and the Hospitals excellent service that they offer at Yorkhill hospital in Glasgow!
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9th May we had a rave in The Venue in Dumfries, Bass Generator, DJ Ballistic, MC Loco and Trippy
John all came to perform for the memory of Faith and we're very proud to say that we raised
£710.95!! All proceeds raised are going to the ECMO Fund in Yorkhill Hospital.
Thanks for your support everyone!!
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This poem was sent to me by my cousin Tammy ... it pretty much sums up Faith\'s time here with
us.
On the 3rd day of September, 2007
God gave me Faith, on loan from Heaven
That day is one I’ll never forget
Her birth was something I’ll never regret
Before she arrived I knew she’d a fight
To make it through to see tomorrows light
But the doctors and nurses they acted fast
And Faith was still here when that day past
72 miles apart for the first few days
My heart was torn in so many ways
By her side is where I wanted to be
But my failing health kept her from me
4 days later I found myself by her side
Time so precious I’d have to bide
Before I could hold her in my arms
She’d away of moving us, she’d magic charms
And I had my faith, I had so much hope
People were wondering how I’d you cope
But all that mattered was the life of my child
My little Angel, so meak and mild
On the 54th day into her fight
She closed her eyes, said goodbye to the light
Her little spirit was begging for peace, for rest
The machines, the nurses were doing their best
And although we didn’t hear him call
The monitors showed her heart rate fall
Her little body couldn’t fight no more
And up in Heaven he opened the door
For 57 days her tired body battled on
Till they day came when her fight was gone
The alarms where silenced, the only sound
Was the lullabies playing all around
The early evening brought the mist
And in my arms, her head I kissed
There wasn’t a single star you could see
And I knew that she was leaving me
On 30th October 2007
The Angels took her to rest in Heaven
And with my Faith they took my heart
And whispered darling you can’t fall apart
I know they all wonder how does she cope
I’ve lost my Faith, my heart, my hope
But I’ve still 2 little boys who’re just as precious to me
And her spirit will never leave it will always be.
REST IN ETERNAL PEACE PRINCESS
i was given an angel to cherish and love,
So tiny, so perfect, a gift from above.
When I looked at her face it was calmness I found
And that peace seemed to spread to all she was around.
Her love touched my heart like fine threads of spun gold
And I thanked God for giving this angel to hold.
But I did not know then that time was my foe
And too soon, with a whisper, my angel would go.
My heart almost breaking, a touch soft as lace
Seemed to wipe at the hurt as it coursed down my face.
I still have my angel to cherish and love,
Those gold threads now shimmer from Heaven above.
And though I can't see her or cuddle her tight,
I won't say goodbye, Little Angel, goodnight.
Thanx
Hi Manda
Thank you so much for the lovely tribute you left on my Josh's site. Tia's Mummy Hannah also told me about you and I tried to leave you a message through here (the site) where it says contact me but I guess that went to Ronnie? Anyway just to say that my son James has additional needs (Autism) and I thought that as Hannah said you knew about this condition that I could have a chat with you about where James is on the spectrum etc and see if you have any advice - especially as to where the baby has gone :0(
Thanx again for your message of support and compassion, it is very kind of you to reach out to me despite your own grief and pain. Reading Faith's story was amazing - what a little fighter, she really made you all very proud. I am truly sorry for you and your family's loss, my heart aches for all of you.
Much love and thanx again
Rachel xxxx
Them and Us
When I tell them that my heart still hurts
They don’t know what to say,
When I tell them that my eyes still cry
They look the other way.
How could they know the pain I have
And the sorrow that I feel?
For they haven’t lost a precious child
So for them this isn’t real.
I can’t say that I blame them
For I was once like they,
Not knowing what to do
I would turn the other way.
But now I know, oh, how I know
What another mother feels,
For only when you have lost a child
Our mutual pain is oh so real.
This painful loss that bereaved mothers share
Brings us closer in our hearts,
Now when we meet and share our babes
We are friends right from the start.
for your mummy faith. xxx
We are connected, My child and I,
by an invisible cord, not seen by the eye.
It's not like the cord that connects
us 'til birth
This cord can't be seen by any on Earth.
This cord does its work right from the start.
It binds us together, attatched to my heart.
I know that it's there, though no one can see,
The invisible cord from my child to me.
The strength of this cord is hard to describe.
It can't be destroyed, it can't be denied.
It's stronger than any cord man could create,
It withstands the test, can hold any weight.
And though you are gone,
Though you are not here with me,
The cord is still there, but no one can see.
It pulls at my heart, I am bruised...I am sore,
But this cord is my lifeline, as never before.
I am thankful that God connects us this way,
A mother and child--Death can't take it away!
THINKING OF YOU
Hiya hope your well hows the boys? Was on reading your baby girls tributes, go on every so often your baby girl touched many I cry every time, just knowing my wee boy was sick too at the same time. So sorry couldn't make the fundraising night for Faith it was good hearing it went well and u raised lots of money Well Done. Your so strong xXx
sending lots of love
i read your story on the cherubs website where my baby boy harry is too, i know your pain and how it will never go away! harry was ECMO too and if it wasn't for this amazing life support we wouldn't of got the twelve precious days we had with him. Faith is so beautiful and will always be with you as harry will be with me.I wish there was an explaintion why our beautiful babies where taken from us but we have our own guardian angels looking over us. sending you and your family lots of love Victoria, harrys mummy also on gonetosoon xxxxxxxx
Well Ickle Bubbs!!
Your charity night was amazing!! We had a little under 200 people in and we've raised a hell of a money for the ECMO fund.
Absolutely everyone was having a fantastic night, even the big names that came. Even Rab got up and started bouncing about when Bass Generator got up and started his set. Mummy had to give a little speech , I've no idea what I said but it seemed to go really well and everyone was really really touched by your story that was there!!
We're all really missing you baby, we all talk about you every day. Be with you again when it's our turn to go that journey. Will be so nice to be able to get a cuddle again!!
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Memories x x x
If we could have a lifetime wish
A dream that would come true,
We'd pray to God with all our hearts
For yesterday and You.
A thousand words can't bring you back
We know because we've tried...
Neither will a thousand tears
We know because we've cried...
You left behind our broken hearts
And happy memories too...
But we never wanted memories
We only wanted You.
Well baby gurl, there's two days to your charity event and everyone is buzzing about it. Bass Generator, DJ Ballistic and MC Loco have all donated their time to come and play to raise money for the ECMO fund along with all the Nitro boys!!
You're story has been insperational to everyone darlin and I'm the one that's lucky enough to share it. You've no idea how proud I am that you are my little girl and we're being able to do all this in your name!!
Rab's been thinkin about you loads at the moment too, he's really missing you! He was talking about you last night saying so. Ali's been talking about you loads too, when the photographer was here from That's Life he spoke so proudly about you.
I love you baby gurl, you'll always be my little Ickle bubbs!!
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